Chest ache, can't fake; stuck here, damn straight Fall down, then clamber up; contents splash out from my heart's overflowing cup Drama karma; bleeds into heart-clutching rapid sinking Buddhist dharma Remember that day when tears streamed out? when my survival was still so much in doubt Haven't moved on, realise that now; in my dreams … Continue reading POEM: DRAMA KARMA



Trigger warning ** some content may upset, especially if you are an animal lover. Tonight I'm frayed. I'm not af-raid....or maybe I am, in a quiet way, underneath. In fact, I know I am afraid. Because life is scary, right? Life can change quickly. Highs can quickly become lows [in my world anyway], and we … Continue reading FRAYED


Today I asked my therapist...."can I write on that white board?"....I have published a quick snapshot of the result. **TW I won't explain it- my head hurts too much- so you'll have to come to your own conclusions. This is mental illness, in the raw. It hurts. I'm really feeling the illness today. summerSHINES©


The grounding process begins. I'm digging deep and securing my emotional roots again. Today has been blissfully easy and private. I have happily hidden, barring a few conversations with selected people of lushness. I needed that after two very special but also stimulating days with my bestie mate. Escapism and grounding seem, on first appearance, to be goals that oppose … Continue reading BPD: ESCAPE TO THE RAINBOW


Gymnasts can't do those amazing things they do on the bars without chalk on their hands. Their hands will slip. They will lose their grip. They may even fall to the ground and do themselves an injury. Gymnasts are not weak people for needing chalky hands. They are just sensible, trying to avoid doing themselves … Continue reading WATER ON CHALK


I hear the hum of the aircraft, still ringing in my ears, The roar of the car barely hides the rumble of my fears. Back home now to safety. Duvet pulled up, I'm smothered, My silent melancholy, proved not so thoroughly covered.   Couldn't hide my sad today; my worried or my mad, Travelling an … Continue reading POST-TRAVEL HUM


Melancholic morning, stay inside your bed, The world hurts- sink your head in a pillow instead. Lavender scented Francais-themed sad, Wrote a post last night that confirmed my bad. Bad girl missing ma famille,  Longing for them, plain as can be. Heavy plenty floaty plenty,  Torn out heart bleeds out till it is dry and … Continue reading MELANCHOLIC


I can't stop writing this holiday so far. It's bonkers! I think this is post number three so far today hides face. Hopefully my readers are not too sick of me.  I'm FULL up of stuffness that needs it's wordy release. Going on holiday is intense (says the blogger who finds EVERYTHING intense).   I … Continue reading HIRE A SWING


This blog is about life with mental health, and the process of having therapy for PTSD and a personality disorder. The lines in the post title are many things: The lines are the local railway track that I used to wander to in heavily dissociated states when I was unwell. The lines are the scars … Continue reading THE LINES


At last.....freedom to type...freedom to let the words topple out of my head and onto this blank page. This blog represents a type of escape for me....this is the place where I make sense of my inner environment and all it's turmoil. Peace. Breathe. Calm. I am having serious thoughts about my future currently. I am … Continue reading ALL ME


Today's topic is validation, especially it's relationship to mental health and how validation can operate on social media platforms. How valid is the human need for validation? And what exactly is validation? This is the Psychology Today definition.... Understanding Validation: A Way to Communicate Acceptance. ... Validation is the recognition and acceptance of another person's thoughts,feelings, … Continue reading VALIDATE ME, OK!